Starting off with a bang!! You're so right about the loneliness of your twenties. There is so much finding yourself and figuring it out and then realizing you had it wrong (or right!) all along, and going back to the drawing board. Rinse, repeat. It's exhausting and yes, so isolating!
Also so jealous of your hot chocolate! It's been weird weather here, but mostly so HOT. I'm so excited for cool weather and hot cocoa 🖤
Also thank you so much for the shout out!!! I'm so grateful for it and it really made my day to see my name on here. I'm so glad you liked the 'i'm a bad friend 'essay!!! 🥰
I related to I’m a Bad Friend so much! You articulated it perfectly.
YES!! Getting it wrong more than I’m getting it right, but at least I’m learning!
I’m so excited for autumn as well, we’re back to actual hot summer weather again here now, which is equally as fun because we can switch out the hot choc for an ice cream sundae 😋
I'll be 30 in just over two weeks and can say I've been through these feelings several times over in my 20's. Life is full of ebbs and flows + you aren't alone! I think one way to combat the feelings of "meh" that can come with these feelings is connecting and knowing we aren't alone, thanks for contributing to that. You're a light!
Happy early birthday Kayli! Yes, I've definitely found talking about it on here super helpful, I've noticed recently that a lot of others in their twenties also feel like they need to have it all together when really none of us do, we're just good at making it look that way. Thank you for leaving such a nice comment, and I hope you have a lovely birthday! <3
Thank you sooooo much for the mention, you beautiful soul! I feel like we could have the most healing chats about all things friendship and the twenties and why this elusive decade rarely looks or feels like we think it should. You’re doing fine, better than fine in fact, because you’re doing you 💖
you're sooooo welcome!! We genuinely would!! I'm not even gonna say it again because you already know what I'm thinking... same person? Honestly, finding like-minded people like you on Substack has been really helpful when it comes to feeling like I'm not alone or a complete weirdo - I mean, you're clearly just as weird as me 😂❤️ Thank you for your lovely words of reassurance Lauren xx
Ella thank you for much for the mention I truly truly appreciate it!
This article really resonates with me, I feel like a lot your writing does which is why I absolutely love your Substack! But yes friendships in twenties is a real struggle! I am very lucky I still have my 2 best friends from secondary but I feel like once secondary is over it has been so hard to make friends or keep them due to distance, people moving away to uni etc.
You're welcome Ciara - I loved your piece!! Can't wait to read more from you.
It's so hard! I think a lot of us are quite nervous to put ourselves out there too, especially when you're not living somewhere like London which has a huge social scene.
Ah thank you! Yes I agree with London and the social scene! I see so many reels of girly running clubs, Pilate clubs etc and think it must be so nice to have that as an option!
THE RUNNING CLUBS!! Yes!! I see those all the time, it's such a good idea. I joined a pilates class in my area thinking it would be a great place to make new friends but it's just me and my perimenopausal huns
No way I’m exactly in the same position! I joined my local yoga and literally nobody my age… So instead I accept it as a ‘gaining independence’ kind of thing although I wanted to make friends in the first place. That is the mindset I have to choose instead lol
Haha I’m glad it’s not just me! I think that’s the best way to look at it, the more things we can do for ourselves the better, and I love when they all tell me they’re jealous that my knees still work, makes me feel special
I literally could have written this myself! I regularly have to remind myself that I'm exactly where I need to be right now and to not rush things. Your 20s are so tough though, it sometimes just seems like everyone else is doing so much better than you!
Thank you for mentioning me in this too Ella, it means a lot 🫶
Aw so glad you liked it Soph! So funny how so many of us are going through it yet we all feel like we’re the only ones 🙃💖 & my pleasure, a super important piece from you
Thankyou so much for mentioning me Ella! Much appreciated 🫶🏽
Also SO much I relate to in this, the loneliness, being happy in yourself without a relationship and Vienna is one of my favourite songs 🥹. I think this will be relatable for many others. You write in such a comforting way! ✨
My 20s are so tough, and I'm in my early 20s.. I've gad this pressure that I should have everything figured out, but I am so alone, I wrote about it in my recent post. I'm so alone, my family doesn't believe in me even when I do good in school, they don't see my efforts trying to get a job. I feel like I'm living my 20s to prove to them that I actually can make it, I can be successful and all that and the pressure is a lot, but I remind myself I'm where i need to be, everything will align slowly by slowly. Thank you for this post <3
It's so tough! Especially when it feels like the current is going against you. Reminding yourself that you're in the right place and doing what's right for you is definitely the best way to go, and you should absolutely believe in yourself! That's step number one - reminding yourself of all you're capable of. Thank you for reading Caroline! 💙
Feeling very reassured that you've said it will come eventually, I think adulthood is such a shock to the system it's no wonder we're all feeling like we're doing it wrong. I'm so happy it resonated with you Madeline, thank you for reading 💗
I feel seen just by reading this piece! Currently in my 20s and EVERYTHING you said is on point 🙈🙈🙈
So happy it resonated with you Kacey!! We got this 🌟
Omg I’m just seeing this now! Tysm for the shout out, girl 🥹💕And everything is unfolding in perfect time. You’re exactly where you need to be 🫶🏼
💞 Your pieces are some of my fave on here right now!! Thanks for all your kindness Kristen 🫶🏻
Starting off with a bang!! You're so right about the loneliness of your twenties. There is so much finding yourself and figuring it out and then realizing you had it wrong (or right!) all along, and going back to the drawing board. Rinse, repeat. It's exhausting and yes, so isolating!
Also so jealous of your hot chocolate! It's been weird weather here, but mostly so HOT. I'm so excited for cool weather and hot cocoa 🖤
Also thank you so much for the shout out!!! I'm so grateful for it and it really made my day to see my name on here. I'm so glad you liked the 'i'm a bad friend 'essay!!! 🥰
I related to I’m a Bad Friend so much! You articulated it perfectly.
YES!! Getting it wrong more than I’m getting it right, but at least I’m learning!
I’m so excited for autumn as well, we’re back to actual hot summer weather again here now, which is equally as fun because we can switch out the hot choc for an ice cream sundae 😋
Thank you for such a kind comment, Angela!! 💞
YES! Ice cream sundae, I like the way you think!!
I'll be 30 in just over two weeks and can say I've been through these feelings several times over in my 20's. Life is full of ebbs and flows + you aren't alone! I think one way to combat the feelings of "meh" that can come with these feelings is connecting and knowing we aren't alone, thanks for contributing to that. You're a light!
Happy early birthday Kayli! Yes, I've definitely found talking about it on here super helpful, I've noticed recently that a lot of others in their twenties also feel like they need to have it all together when really none of us do, we're just good at making it look that way. Thank you for leaving such a nice comment, and I hope you have a lovely birthday! <3
Thank you sooooo much for the mention, you beautiful soul! I feel like we could have the most healing chats about all things friendship and the twenties and why this elusive decade rarely looks or feels like we think it should. You’re doing fine, better than fine in fact, because you’re doing you 💖
you're sooooo welcome!! We genuinely would!! I'm not even gonna say it again because you already know what I'm thinking... same person? Honestly, finding like-minded people like you on Substack has been really helpful when it comes to feeling like I'm not alone or a complete weirdo - I mean, you're clearly just as weird as me 😂❤️ Thank you for your lovely words of reassurance Lauren xx
Ella thank you for much for the mention I truly truly appreciate it!
This article really resonates with me, I feel like a lot your writing does which is why I absolutely love your Substack! But yes friendships in twenties is a real struggle! I am very lucky I still have my 2 best friends from secondary but I feel like once secondary is over it has been so hard to make friends or keep them due to distance, people moving away to uni etc.
You're welcome Ciara - I loved your piece!! Can't wait to read more from you.
It's so hard! I think a lot of us are quite nervous to put ourselves out there too, especially when you're not living somewhere like London which has a huge social scene.
This is such a nice comment, thank you so much ❤️
Ah thank you! Yes I agree with London and the social scene! I see so many reels of girly running clubs, Pilate clubs etc and think it must be so nice to have that as an option!
THE RUNNING CLUBS!! Yes!! I see those all the time, it's such a good idea. I joined a pilates class in my area thinking it would be a great place to make new friends but it's just me and my perimenopausal huns
No way I’m exactly in the same position! I joined my local yoga and literally nobody my age… So instead I accept it as a ‘gaining independence’ kind of thing although I wanted to make friends in the first place. That is the mindset I have to choose instead lol
Haha I’m glad it’s not just me! I think that’s the best way to look at it, the more things we can do for ourselves the better, and I love when they all tell me they’re jealous that my knees still work, makes me feel special
Hahah that’s funny and sweet
I literally could have written this myself! I regularly have to remind myself that I'm exactly where I need to be right now and to not rush things. Your 20s are so tough though, it sometimes just seems like everyone else is doing so much better than you!
Thank you for mentioning me in this too Ella, it means a lot 🫶
Aw so glad you liked it Soph! So funny how so many of us are going through it yet we all feel like we’re the only ones 🙃💖 & my pleasure, a super important piece from you
Thankyou so much for mentioning me Ella! Much appreciated 🫶🏽
Also SO much I relate to in this, the loneliness, being happy in yourself without a relationship and Vienna is one of my favourite songs 🥹. I think this will be relatable for many others. You write in such a comforting way! ✨
Thank you Emily!! 💞 definitely not the easiest thing to navigate but we’ve got this x
just had to say this line, and the 13 going on 30 photo bring me back to childhood!
My 20s are so tough, and I'm in my early 20s.. I've gad this pressure that I should have everything figured out, but I am so alone, I wrote about it in my recent post. I'm so alone, my family doesn't believe in me even when I do good in school, they don't see my efforts trying to get a job. I feel like I'm living my 20s to prove to them that I actually can make it, I can be successful and all that and the pressure is a lot, but I remind myself I'm where i need to be, everything will align slowly by slowly. Thank you for this post <3
It's so tough! Especially when it feels like the current is going against you. Reminding yourself that you're in the right place and doing what's right for you is definitely the best way to go, and you should absolutely believe in yourself! That's step number one - reminding yourself of all you're capable of. Thank you for reading Caroline! 💙
It is!!
Feeling very reassured that you've said it will come eventually, I think adulthood is such a shock to the system it's no wonder we're all feeling like we're doing it wrong. I'm so happy it resonated with you Madeline, thank you for reading 💗